The unexpected..

ahh..

had submitted registration for de Chingay 09 volunteer.. but now, with the training schedule being finalised, there are 2 trainings on weekdays.. which i cant attend :/

it falls exactly on the week my colleague is on block leave, which means i cant apply for leave.

sigh. not fated.. =/

a disappointment, unexpected.

was so looking fwd to it..

yet another year of waiting..

Just for fun..

one of de messages recd today:

“Wow sorry you look so cute, I feel we are meant to meet, don’t you think ? (tell me I am too direct, am I not ?) :p what do you say about a glass of red wine with a complete stranger at bar new asia in swiss hotel sometime this week ? (I know it sounds crazy but I’ll be well dressed and we can still meet for a chinese tea in Boat Quay. see I am trying to find solutions for us “

okie… bedtime!

-0108-

Life’s uncertainty..

Life is so.. unpredictable.

The tragic news..

It is so depressing.

We will nvr know whats gonna happen to us tmr..

-1900-

Smiles smiles..

This morning was quite a bit of scare :/

My vision blurred out of a sudden and i blackout in de bathroom.. when i gain back my vision, right side of my face was lying on de floor i had fallen face down… now bruised with a blue black on my knee and a cut on de gums, with one teeth bleeding *eeks*

and my right cheekbone hurts. it feels like a blue black but there’s no sign of blue black colour (lol).

I am getting de giddy spells/ vision blurring quite often recently. thankfully, today’s blackout happen at home (and not when im outside!). =/

hmm.

Met the Gossip Partners for coffee this aftnoon. It was great to see them tho it was just a short while ;p Every single complaint they made bout work.. they added emphasis on how much i was being missed (verbally & thru msg)! hehe..

So i jokingly replied over lunch:

“you only realise my importance after 1 year? so sad lor…!”

well well… their stand:

“If we miss you de moment you left de bank, it will be bcos of “xi guan”. We are soooo used to having u with us. Naturally we will not be used to not seeing you ….

But if after 1 yr, we still tink of you and longed for your presence, it means you are impt and truly missed by us!”

It took me quite awhile before i unds wad they meant… (oops). As we chatted, GP1 teared… and as if it was to reassure me, she mention again..

“we really miss you very much, if only you were still here”.

I could only describe tat i felt very touched. Being appreciated… is sth i really really yearn for, be it in terms of family/ work/ friendship/ relationship.

GP2 asked if i wld wan to return to de ex-office shld there be opportunity as there is a current vacancy..

oh well.

The decision to leave in Jan was indeed a hard one. Weighing de pros n cons was an even tougher job. Didnt had much time to bid goodbye due to de urgency of my current workplc.

The heart really wanted to stay on… de feelings (for the job + overall envt) was very strong. I didnt wan to leave.. but i guess i had to be more rationale at de end of de day. Job prospect was practically nil. Parting is part & parcel of life…. sth which is very.. unavoidable. Its basically a matter of time, i guess.

So, there’s no more turning back.

No doubt, i still missed de daily breakfast cum lunch and pantry sessions.. but tat can only exist as part of my memory with them. Back den, i was really happy. Even when i was over-piled with work, i still look fwd to de next day as there was sth i cld look fwd to everyday. We wld even stay late to accompany each other if need be. When i was overcoming de break-up obstacle, they were also thr, morally & physically.

Those good old days… -hard to be forgotten.

Life….

-2330-

Acne

Just realised tat there is a correlation between acne and stomach problem. Acne on the cheeks links to stomach problems and acne on the chin links to liver problems. I remembered a fren’s fren who did tell me bout it wen we met at a function… but i didnt tink much of it. I simply chuck it to the excuse “stress”..

After reading up a bit..

   “For proper digestion of food to take place in the stomach, presence of adequate amounts of hydrochloric acid or Hcl is very important. When there is scarcity of Hcl in the body, the body misses on the absorption of many important minerals. Deficiency of important minerals in the body in turn weakens the immune system. As your body becomes weak, it loses the capacity to fight back bacteria which itself is a major cause for acne problem.

   If pancreas is also deficient in the enzymes content, the food tends to stay there and with passage of time starts producing toxins. These toxins are then evenly distributed throughout the blood leading to impure blood. And presence of impure blood is also one of the main causes of appearance of acne on face and on body.

   Because you eat, breathe, and create so many toxins, the liver has a hard time neutralizing these toxins. This puts an extreme toxic load on your liver, which eventually leads to the excretion of these toxins through your skin and face. Excessive toxins coming out through your skin can lead to acne and other skin disorders.

   A healthy diet plan and lifestyle is a route to radiant, gorgeous and problem free skin.”

Its so demoralising every time i look into de mirror.  I’m hoping my acne will disappear improve soon, since my stomach problem is more or less stable at de moment.

It is depressing.. when you see ya frens eat nice yummy food, but you cant! *sob* Still, the pain… will often serve as a reminder to me not to anyhow-eat. :/

-2245-

argg..

:/

i get asked de same old questions by my parents today. Morning, afternoon and nite… they asked the same thing when i’ve already answered them earlier.

Thats like… 3 X 2 = 6 times! It mayb out of concern, but seriously.. it can be really… irritating to answer 6 times (in a day!).

i hope this is not gonna happen tmr again. Argg…

*breathes*

*breathes*

i happen to chance upon this.. Udders ice-cream! It looks delicious, i wanna try!

-2000-

Table Tennis

I just return from a game of table tennis- mixed double. Im not a sports person.. but jus went ahead to give my boss face (lol). Everyone seem so prepared… even de gals brought their attire!

err… except me

i was even in… heels :/ i didnt tink there was much “running” to be done, so bringing along another pair of shoes didnt came to my mind.

oh well. i eventually did survive playing in my heels, heh. 2nd place aint tat bad yeah? *grin*

i didnt realise table tennis cld be so fun! hehe. i was sooo00oo reluctant to go earlier…. =p

Friday morning didnt start off pretty well… but im glad it ended well :)

Its de weekend..!

i miss my bed……………..

-2305-

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of random..

another nitemare last nite (!) woke up in shivers. i tink its de scariest one i had so far.

woke up. heard of another 2 breakups. 4 broken hearts? hmm..

called in sick today (not cos of de nitemare!).

will have back log at work again, sianz.

and another looooong meeting tmr… :/

friday nite gone too… dept’s quarterly game competition

-1045-

upset..

.. with myself.

there goes my effort….

my determination is like de stocks…. always fluctuating!

i hate this feeling. it makes me wanna cry.

i can only blame myself!

-2230-

heh..

In bout a month’s time, its de yearly xmas festive season again!

Xmas Tree have been setup at Raffles City and Vivo… looks great and better than last year’s in my opinion. have yet to see the one at Paragon & Taka tho…heh.

jingles filling up de air! =) *smiles*

& in 2 months time…. its Chinese New Year!

wow, so faaast? ;p

With de current economic crisis, am trying to cut down (very much) on shopping alr. heh. So perhaps, not much of new clothes for cny09! 

Nevertheless, still looking fwd to both festives!

i wonder wad im gonna do on Xmas…. hmm. :)

-2218-

aww….

 Aint he adorable? geez.

“Mummy” came back yest for a short while and brought her handsome boy along! ;p Nice to see her, tgt with cutie Ernest… cant wait for her to return from her Maternity Leave

1st shot taken at my desk, while feeding him biscuit, heh.

Afterwhich, he asked “do you want to go with me take MAYO..?”

i asked him to repeat a number of times, but still…i heard “MAYO”. =(

Only to realise after tat he actually meant “MILO”! *alamak*

-.-”"”"

2nd shot taken at de pantry- him with his biscuit and cup of MAYO! hehe……… and he gave a kiss before leaving! *grin*

  

had a nite mare last nite :X i can stil rem bits n pieces of it…. scary :/ Thank goodness Mum woke me up, else de nitemare episode will continue! Didnt had a reali good sleep partly due to de nitemare, plus granny fell ill…. kept vomiting non stop in de middle of de nite.. felt so helpless. She look so weak. :(

Granny didnt join for marketing-cum-breakfast due to giddiness.

Come noon.. she was much better! We watched TVB shows tgt! hehe. Kinda regret not learning Hokkien & Cantonese when i was younger.. it will be so much easier to converse with her :/

She talked bout 4D/ Toto out of a sudden, so Dad decided to bring out his ice cream stick numbers! lol. Granny “shook” de numbers like those “qian” in temples… ;p

(We use to choose numbers for Dad last time when we were much younger! 2 numbers each for bro, sis & i, lol….)

  

The time spent is always short cos granny only comes over once a mth. Nevertheless, nice to see her smiling again…. :)

heh… a new collection added last wk! Anythg pink def makes me happy, hehe. Thank UuuU. ;p

-2305-

Ignorance = Bliss (?)

relationships hav failed me a few times. its prolly hard to hav faith tat things will last…

friendship…. was sth i had more faith in…. yet, possibly another disappointment.

 

I tink i have been tinkin quite a bit … on a simple, yet impt word, friends.

Perhaps cos certain words hurt.. it has been recurring in my mind.

Sometime back.. a good fren, “confronted” me…. tinkin tat i was hiding things from her. She tout i was ”attached” and that she wasnt de first to know bout wads going on in my life etc…

(There wasnt tat “someone” at all).

The tone used and how it was being put across wasnt really v pleasant. As much as i pretended to be “ok with all de questions”, i was in fact…. very much hurt. I asked why she had asked in this manner, but de question was being shoved away.

If i really was seeing someone, she will definitely be de first few to know. (First few, cos i dun wanna miss out informing the “Gossip Partners” as well.) I wld wan to share de joy with her… just like how she intro-ed her bf to me. After all, gd fren has privileges rite?

Good fren is possibly an understatement. After so much friendship turmoil ive gone thru…. de last on my mind is to lose another fren. She is one person whom i usually confide in, be it work or r/s… shopping & catching up at least once a mth amidst our hectic work. Our age gap is fairly apart but we stil do have (almost) de same frequency.

Upon my return to Sg, i was still on leave for a few days. She called while i was outside and it became a missed call. Shortly after, i received a msg… (didnt sound v friendly).

She tout tat i was trying to be arrogant! Tat i din wanna pick up her call as i was trying to show off i am “happily outside” and unlike her “working in de office”…. (???)

Frankly speaking, i was (very) shocked with what i heard. I dun even see any “link” between arrogant versus not picking up her call. Is there any relation?? Has it become a “crime” if i happen to miss a phone call?

i have yet to convince myself with a satisfactory answer.

Upset & disappointed, but life stil goes on….

D: “why try to make others happy when you are not happy yourself? why matter so much bout how others tink? if you dun put yourself before others, den who will?”

Sometimes, its gd to share with guys and hear their views. Thanks D!

Feels relieved after writing… i’m fine=)

-0019-

吳克群《愛太痛》

聽了很想哭…. :/

The Singles’ Day

Just found out that today’s Singles’ Day! – 11th November

Didnt know there was such a “day”! lol…

From wikipedia..

This name came about because the date consists of four “ones”. When written down in Arabic numerals, it looks like four single people standing tgt. The main way to celebrate Singles Day is to have dinner with your single friends.

For breakfast, singles often eat four “You-tiao” representing the four “ones” in “11.11″ and one Baozi (bun) representing the middle dot.

Many singles choose to say goodbye to their single lives on this day. The date can also mean “only one”.

Interesting huh? heh.

Cheers to all Singles!

(On a sidenote, would 11.11.2011 be an even memorable day for married couples-to-be? one and only one? )

-2230-